To My Friends

Friends of honor
Friends of integrity
To this day we rise
I come to you in honesty
Offer you my respect
With my heart I offer gratitude
And honor the souls that you are
Sometimes our road is twisted
Mistakes we will make
We honor them all with apology
We ask and then expect more of ourselves
We deliver more
It is in our support and love
We find our way
I thank you for the truths you’ve told
Those I saw and those I resisted
Those that made me cry
For they were offered with love
From honesty
You came to me with heart open
I hold these hearts with tenderness
I know the grace of who you are
It is more than this day
This month or year
The infinite nature of our connection is within
We are those who know and see these things
We journey alone but cross paths
Some crossings are short
Some long
All are significant and enduring
You remind me of who I am
Who I was created to be in wholeness
I do the same for you
This path has been so very hard
Each day you all remind me of its beauty
And the blessings we share
Often lost in the fog of our lessons
It presents itself back to us
We listen and we pray together and for one another
We sit quiet and exchange energies
Near or far there is no distance between us
In moments we may take one another for granted
This is not one of those moments
I am in awe of all that you have accomplished
While a clueless world looks on
They see nothing
Feel nothing
As they sit unknowing in the circle of our love
In the greatest of these challenges
Somehow we have found one another
From across this earth we love
It is the most wondrous gift
May we fill our hearts with magic
Then bless it upon each other
We have earned these blessings
Through honoring each other
And it is with a vulnerable heart
That I choose to give blessings of love
To each and all of you
And hold you in sacred space
Honored to call you friends

Tatiacha ~ March 12, 2011

New Pathway

Creeping into view a new pathway is emerging
Eagles soar above
They follow the serpentine flow of the river below
Ice lingers along the banks crackling in the winter sun
I call out for greater sight like the eagles above me
Allow me to see where this pathway leads
For this moment I am grounded
No sight is granted
I must simply tread this winding pathway with my heart
Trust every turn
Acknowledge every stone
Every tree along the way
Root out my foundations and strengths to carry me forward
A new beach is uncovered every time the tide goes out
These emotions have been beating our shores battering us
But the tide has now turned
No one knows what we will find here
Everything has been changed
Some things seem fresh and new
Others damaged from the tidal surges
How they mesh from here we must wait to see
Give over the spirits say
Allow yourself to be receptive to any outcome
One thing leads to something greater
This is the time for dominoes to tumble in a preordained order
I know not this order
All that is seen is the tipping of the first
There is no longer free will choice in this sequence
There is a loss of perceived power
Leading the mind to ponder things unthinkable
Why would such things ever be preordained
Even the mind knows they would not
Still in the absence of the normal it wanders forth in deception
I begin to trust this unfolding
As I become accustomed to its essence
I know I must move farther to embrace it fully
A destiny thus waiting is calling
Elements moving in or out of my pathway
Chosen of my Creator must be accepted with grace
For every sorrow I may befall on this trail
There are joys I am being led to
I will feel each feeling
Give it its truth and acknowledgement
Then continue forward on this new pathway

Tatiacha ~ February 11, 2011

I Will Follow



Look up

It looks

I stop

It stands

I understand

It gazes forth at me

I picture it

I move forward

It runs away

I feel blessed

Return home

Share the news

It’s a message

Meaning is clear

Purpose explained

Heart has heard

I will follow


Engtovo ~ October 3, 2007

All Is Well

Thank you

Hummingbirds and butterflies

Pass by my window

In their flight they give me pause

A moment to remember

The gifts that I have been given

The grace that has been my life

There is no lesson that was not a gift

No pain so great that it could remove joy from my world

It is through my choice that I make this so

It is through you that I know it is my choice

Thank you

You have stood beside me in every moment

Judging none of them

Compassion and humor as your teaching tools

Time passes and I do not stop to pause often enough

To remember how blessed I am in your friendship

I do not wish to take you for granted

You are far too precious to me

Your own gifts you give so freely

That they have become woven into the fabric of my life

Woven into the whole of who I have become

Thank You

Blessed is every moment we have walked hand in hand

Musical tunes of every mood sung between us

Thoughts shared in secret

Plots and plans for upliftment plotted

Some just for the fun of it

Insights turned into overviews

If I could give anyone a gift

It would be the gift of having a “you” in their lives

But I know that the gift of you in my life required me to receive you

You made that easy for me

Thank You

There is no way for any to understand the bond between us

The communication and loyalty

The big cat stalking in the energy

The soft purr of contentment when you wrap me in safety

Allowing me to be vulnerable for an hour

For a day

For a week

My perceptions of this place are different than others

You have showed me new ways to see

Thank You

Life in its frustrations and lessons

Does not lose its meaning in your presence

For every negative thought I spout out

You have ten positive things to offer

Who would I be without the love that you envelop me in

You hold out to me my potential

You have always believed in me

In so doing you have showed me I can believe in myself

No words could convey what you mean to me

Though these words are small and so insignificant

I say them anyway

Thank You Bestali

All is well

Engtovo ~ July 26, 2004

Shifting By Choice

This time is busy with process

Pregnant with possibility

Healing takes place in waking and sleeping time

I do not know all that is healing

There is too much to keep track of to fully understand the depth of

I know only that it is the appropriate time and place

I allow this to commence

It is good

I embrace each passing day as it lifts from me old thought

And leaves me feeling the new energies that I am becoming

At moments I am overwhelmed by the immensity of what is passing

Or perhaps the immensity of what I am becoming

I am uncertain which is more in my heart in any given moment

I just feel the shifting

It is like the sands of the desert

The configuration at any given moment is not definable

And yet there is comfort in the knowledge

That the shifting will continue

I cannot sustain the same configuration

And that is good

I am always changing

Parts blow away as the winds assist my shift

Those parts are no longer needed

I do not attempt to hold them to me

There is freedom in this shifting

No expectation of sustaining one way of being

Those parts of me that think they should sustain such are weary

They are giving way to the winds


I sigh in relief

Give over to the natural flow of the universe

Allow me to be that which is right and perfect for the given moment

I am able to receive in this space that which is needed

To be of service to the whole

And give away that which will serve as well

There is a remembrance of this way of being

It is barely below the conscious surface

It is bubbling up to be known

My heart is welcoming it

My mind is starting to welcome it as well

My life is becoming the truth of my true desires

Empowered by my Creator

Not by my old and tired way of thinking

It is as if I have reached the 100th money of my own thoughts

Those in alignment with Creator begin to propagate themselves

And crowd out the old

They grow exponentially

The old thoughts see their own extinction

They do not even bother to fight for their lives any more

They are resigned to their demise

They are influenced by the new way to understand

Their demise is in the best interest of the whole of this being that I AM

I have made a choice and I have made it many times

As many as it took

Now the truth of this choice

Is creating me

My life

My future

My service

It is the force through which the Creator is shifting me

My choice

It is the orderly random chaos that is healing me

Bringing me to the divine state of balance that is my birthright

Allowing the spirit of the Christ within me to stand forth

In true expression

For that is the choice made

Engtovo ~ October 15, 2003

Cloudless Dawn

Hey Hey Hey Hey

Torment me not

Dreams of scattered activity

Another way births

This way is simple

Confusion has given heed to new focus

New understanding

Heart sings clear

Shines like the sun at a cloudless dawn

Brilliant it greets me

Mind has released

Let go to heart

Another year passes

My thought moves closer to true expression

I see before me my dharma

I welcome it with gratitude

As I welcome the sun at dawn

The rays of my future crest the mountain top

And fall upon me with gentle simplicity

They warm my body and my heart

And call me into the work of this day

With understanding of the energies that follow in days to come

If not the actions of those days themselves

The night has pulled me to this moment of dawning

With it I stand purified before my creator

Each ray of light fills me to overflowing

I am fulfilled in my every desire

There are no clouds on my horizon

The dawn has brought the blue sky in fullness

Hand in hand with the pink of love

And the orange of creation

This cloudless dawn

Fully awakens the last part of my heart

That remained fearful and unable to trust

It has brought me home

To the truth


Engtovo ~ November 18, 2002


There is no thought of indecision now

Understanding has washed over us all

The past now shows itself

In its shadow and its light

The force of healing and resolution guides the way home

Love opens the door for all things to become possible

There is no hurt that is left unforgiven

Remembered for it’s teaching only

A memory of event remains

Now seen with eyes wide open

The hurt seems so far away

Past merges into the moment

To bring peace to our hearts once weary and heavy

The future stands out as only a sign post

A choice

This moment we live

We love

We experience one another

Freedom emerged from the cocoon of self we have held wrapped in the threads of

past feelings and deeds

Like our butterfly sibling

The bursting forth is occurring now


Thank you God

Engtovo ~ December 1, 2001