Samantha

Samantha Footprints- b&w (2)

Laying still
Mouth agape
So beautiful
This tiny body
Perfect fingers and nails
I long to see her eyes
Hear a gurgle or a cry
She is of me
This empty vessel I hold
She grew within my womb
We shared a life most intimate
Touching me from inside
She moved and tapped
I dreamed a future for her
Knowing she was a girl
There was no proof then
I just knew
My baby girl
I looked at the little tiny outfits
Imagining her precious smile
I wait while my stomach grows
Feeling her presence
Then movement stopped
I no longer felt her presence
There was an absence of pressure
My heart knew
I did not need the doctor to tell me
My precious daughter was gone
Dead within me
I knew
The tears could not be contained
They flowed in an endless stream
Enough to fill a river of anguish
A relationship ending abruptly
Without explanation
Left with labor to induce
And then this little body
Young and inexperienced
I did not dress you
Or clean you
I did not know I would want to
The cap hides your head misshapen by birth
But you are perfect
Your soul free in the wind
I am alone
The only person who knew you
The only person to grieve you
My beloved one
My daughter
I did not know you would be my only child
But even 10 children could not erase you
You flew away with a piece of my heart
And that is as it should be
In the stillness you live
Sending back love to me

Tatiacha ~ May 18, 2018

Samantha Final

 

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Elk

Whispers seek outpouring of strength
An omen to portend of this time
They cross in front of me
And begin to run
I watch and feel the urgency
Speed and agility in union
Bending to cross the creek
They serpentine to the right and pick up speed
The other moves steadily unaware
They head right for impact
Hit she lay on the ground in shock
Gathering around with good intention
A small group convenes
Is she dead
They ponder her fate
Prayers move off them to her
Slowly she comes around
Moving behind obstacles
Hidden from view
She moves opposite the herd
Away from the scene and the danger
She emerges
She crosses over in front of me again
As she moves through the dirt and mud
That is this road
She trips and stumbles
Then returns to her feet
Her grace strength and stamina obvious
She picks up speed
Still somewhat apprehensive
Now understanding this close call
She moves out to the forest alone
The depth of her injuries unknown
She has survived another day
My heart pours out with love to this sign
This inspiration of divine timing
We all survive each day
Until it is the day we do not
I will take my hits
With some I may trip and stumble
But I will return to my path
And continue with the grace of an Elk

Tatiacha ~ March 3, 2011

Kodiak

Kodiak 

You came with the yoke of God

Bearing the name of medicine present in the synchronistic moments of unfoldment

Your pure spirit shined with exuberance and youthful joy

Heart at your center emanating out to all who approached with gentleness

Cry we will not at your passing

As you have asked that it be so

“See what I have taught with my life, that is my gift”

You say unto me this eve

This lack of tears foreign to my nature at a loss

Leaves a feeling of void

I attempt now to do what you ask

I will begin with the pipe

Prayers for all life

In joy and freedom

And so it is

That your spirit’s gift is shown to me

In a most personal way

Pacifism reigns within

Conflicts leave me

May we run not from anything, not to anything

But simply for the freedom felt in experiencing the physical expression on this earth with

childlike joy

I will give my joy up for no one

But will share it with all

I will walk with gentleness

and remember to express my excitement and love for every moment

and every person I love

May this love, peace, joy and freedom spread as quick as wildfire

Transforming and transmuting with the power of the divine spark within

Aho Kodiak

Totem teacher wolf spirit

May your joy on earth carry on into spirit and touch souls there as it has here

May all you have taught me continue to unfold in my heart

and move out into expression everyday

You have made the world a better place simply by choosing to be in it

Tatiacha ~ March 12, 2002

Actions

Shock is the minds way of protecting itself from an immediate pain

Our gift it is

Gives us time to slowly integrate what has occurred that was so tragic in force

When shock wears off and rage ensues

That is the time to be vigilant

For this is the time we shall act in a form that is not of God’s highest expression for us

Time should be taken

A period of cooling off

A period of waiting

Of grieving

No decision need be made now

There will still be time tomorrow or next week for actions

Just actions

Unjust actions

All actions

But if we are to look back in determination and decide an action was unjust

Let us have made in not in the time of rage

Let us have made it in ignorance

For at least ignorance has a solution to prevent its reoccurrence

Acting in rage does not

Engtovo ~ October 24, 2001

911

September morn greeted us with pain

Twas not the finest of hours

Was a tragic heralding not of terrorist action

But of covert plans in action by the dark ones

A day foreseen by those with and without bodies

An uncloaking of final battle

Disguised as a victimization by an oppressor of country

In fact an act of an oppressor of freedom and divine human expression

There is no villain as one would make out

For the one pointed out is far too small

Far too pathetic a man

This is the deed of many

This is an act of power, by power, for power

An act of elite control of the masses

Through fear and subjugation

Many will never see the truth that lies therein

As their brains have been washed

With the propaganda of the oppressors

They will still believe as they are carted off to camps

That these acts are not of their own making

By refusing to be vigilant of the structure they co-created

It is an ugly scene

A tragedy of a play

But there is no surprise to those who have listened to the heart

Where God speaks loudly

The ugliness will continue for a time

The suffering will ensue as God hath warned us all

But the war, the true battle has already been won

The dark ones know not that they have lost as they wallow in their ignorance

The sun shall rise on a new time

And the suffering will end

I look to the present to see how the actions of the ignorant

Awaken the hearts of many that were sleeping

They have actually served God in bringing home some

Who may have slept indefinitely

I look to the future and I see the service that stands before me as path

I feel and know no danger for as God has foreseen these days

God has foreseen a trail that will lead the willing through these end times

Indeed there are no easy answers

Brother will turn upon brother

Parents and children will come to distrust one another

The hearts of many will be ripped to shreds with lies of hate

But Gods life will still be here to sustain

Gods truth will be spoken above the din of war

The dark ones show themselves in these days

And the love of God shows itself as well

Love is stronger than hate

Forgiveness stronger than grudge

And I say this to the elite ones who terrorize the masses

I forgive you this day, for this 911 tragedy, and for all that you will commence with

For it is God you shall face when you leave the planet

And facing God’s full forgiveness

Will offer you a reflection of truth so great

You will plunge yourself into despair and misery over what you have done

You will place upon yourself the pain you inflicted to others

This my friends is hell

And that is where you will find yourself soon

Engtovo – October 24, 2001