This Love

Stirrings and angst
Doubts based in fear
Terrorize my thoughts
Heart in chaos
Turing the up side down
Right side up
Old and new meshed together
Tangles of filaments
Knowing
Question
Knowing
Demanding to be heard
Resistance
Demanding to be ignored
This heart runs wild
It has no counter
A complete rebellion of reason
No reasons can be found
That it cares to hear
Or will acknowledge or consider reasonable
It does as it pleases
Asks no permission
Waits for nothing
Accepts no limitation
Unfettered it demands what it wants
Any sense of control an illusion
I am at its mercy
Surrender it screams
With no fear of outcome
The more resistance
The louder the screams
It crushes me
With physical discomfort
Tangible responses
That even the body will not tolerate
Crying out for breath
For release
For free expression
This love won’t be held down
Held back
Contained or ignored

Tatiacha Engtovo Bhodsvatan ~ 12-16-10

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